Juxtaposition
by Casandravus
Summary: Noun: two things being seen or placed close together, especially for comparison or contrast. Kyoya and Haruhi journey side-by-side, realizing there may be more to compare than contrast. [A KyoHaru story collection. Chapter 14: Photostat]
1. Playlist for Haruhi

**Story Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran High School Host Club, any of its characters, trademarks, or other properties.**

Chapter Disclaimer: I also do not own any of the songs mentioned within this story. "First Love" belongs to Utada Hikaru, and "The Sound of Silence" belongs to Simon & Garfunkel; version referenced within this story belongs to Disturbed (Immortalized, 2015). No profit is made from the writing or publication of this story.

* * *

A/N: This is my first OHSHC story! I've always been a fan of Kyoya/Haruhi... This will be a drabble/one-shot series for them. Not all entries will be connected; I have a lot of ideas for this ship and I plan to write as many of them as I can.

For this chapter: Another fic I read on this site inspired me to think about what kind of playlist Kyoya would have to help him deal with his feelings for Haruhi. Italics are for both thoughts and song lyrics; it'll be made clear which is which. Also Kyoya is really hard to write in-character in emotional situations for me... Hope you enjoy!

* * *

"Kyoya-senpai?"

Haruhi's voice snaps him from his reverie. "Yes, Haruhi?"

The Host Club has been studying in Music Room #3; it's exams week so the administrators are letting students stay overnight on campus on conditions of safety and signed contracts. It's late and everyone's exhausted, although Tamaki and the twins are still managing to make a racket.

"Do you have a music player I can use? I have my headphones, but my music player died. I didn't think to bring the charger for it, sorry."

He quirks a brow at her as he adjusts his glasses. "You study better with music?"

She tosses an annoyed look at the hyperactive trio. "It depends. If there's too much outside noise, it helps; if you don't have it, it's fine, I just thought you'd be the best person to ask..."

He smiles at her and pulls out a small device. "Here, feel free to borrow the charger as well," he says, quickly pulling his earbuds out and handing the bundle to her. "I must warn you, my music taste is rather eclectic. Unexpected, even."

"That's fine, Senpai. Thank you," she gives a small bow and returns to her corner of the room, unlocking the device and putting her headphones on. "Ah, much better," she sighs as she curls into herself, reading a text for her English class.

It takes a few minutes for him to remember the playlist; by then, he's too tired to care. Kyoya finds a couch to stretch out on and quickly sets his glasses on a coffee table before drifting to sleep. _If she finds it, she finds it. Her reaction will be interesting to watch, at any rate_.

* * *

 _Another instrumental piece; very Kyoya-senpai_ , Haruhi thinks to herself. She gasps as she realizes the time: 2:00 a.m. _It's been that long!? Ah shoot..._

She glances around the room; all the boys - including Kyoya - are asleep. _May as well take this time to do my maths - what's this_ _?_

The 'playlists' option pops up on the music player's screen. Interested, Haruhi follows the prompt and sees that Kyoya has **dozens** of playlists: Flights, Drives, Call Holds, Elevator Music - the brunette quietly giggles at that - Family, Writing, Studies, Train Rides... It seems the man has a playlist for everything. _Maybe music helps him deal with things since he's so reserved._

That doesn't explain the Haruhi playlist though. The font for it is different from the rest; it's a soft purple with a diamond on each side. With another look at a still-sleeping Kyoya, she clicks it excitedly. _No one's ever done something like this for me. Hope he's not too mad when he wakes up_.

* * *

Hyde's "Season's Call" is the first one to play, and it surprises her. _Why would this make him think of me?_ she thinks to herself, nodding her head to the beat. _Maybe the power of emotion behind it? I don't know._

Kyoya's music player is on shuffle, so when she clicks the 'next' button, "First Love" by Utada Hikaru plays in her ears. Her eyes widen and she gives a small gasp. _Well, there's no misinterpreting **that**. Let's see what's next, maybe it was a fluke..._

Song after song, his heart opens itself to her. She almost feels dirty, like she's stolen a secret, but the small pulse of happiness running through her eases the guilt. Haruhi's surprised most by a favorite song of hers coming on; tears prick her eyes, and she skips it to keep from crying.

A few minutes later, she's silently sobbing in spite of herself. It's a new version of a song her dad likes; to her in this moment - emotional and sleep-deprived at 2:25 a.m. - it sounds like an unrequited love song, particularly two stanzas:

 _People writing songs_  
 _That voices never share_  
 _And no one dare_  
 _Disturb the sound of silence  
"Fools" said I, "you do not know_  
 _Silence like a cancer grows_  
 _Hear my words that I might teach you_  
 _Take my arms that I might reach to you"_  
 _But my words like silent raindrops fell_  
 _And echoed in the wells of silence_ _  
_

This song practically screams 'Kyoya': withdrawn but desperately reaching out for love and acknowledgement. Haruhi feels blindsided, although she can't quite place why. _I can't study like this. I need to sleep._ She rubs her eyes with a shallow breath as she stands. Despite her tears, she puts the song on repeat - she feels safe with his music (his heart) ringing in her head.


	2. A Different Kind of Dance

A/N: Hey all! This chapter takes place in the last episode of the anime; just a bit of introspection on "what if the last dance scene had gone differently?". Enjoy!

* * *

Cutting into Tamaki's romantic moment for a dance with Haruhi feels like a swan song, but that's all right. It's a beautiful way to end a beautiful night after a long and grueling day for them all.

In pushing her back to his friend, Kyoya expects an uncomplicated ending to the whole affair. He expects the blonde to sweep her off her feet and confess his love before the night is out.

Somehow, he's forgotten that Haruhi has never been one to just do what's expected.

* * *

Haruhi surprises him by grabbing his hand when he isn't looking, initiating another dance.

"Well isn't _this_ an interesting notion," the Shadow King says with a particularly feline grin.

She laughs. "Tamaki is cool and all, but I just don't seem him that way," she confesses. "I'm horrible, aren't I?"

"Did you tell him so?" Kyoya asks with a quirked brow.

"Yeah, he seems fine," she tilts her head toward the Prince, who's dancing with a girl a minute. "I mean, he's hurt about it - but he said that should pass soon enough."

"Knowing him, it probably will."

Haruhi giggles. "You're wondering why I'm dancing with you, right?"

"Frankly, yes. I'd thought you would still be with Tamaki now."

The girl bites her lower lip. "I thought so too, Kyoya. I can't be with someone that I have no desire to."

He nods, still wondering why she's chosen to come back to _him_ , of all the (former) Host Club members. "You still haven't answered my question."

"I'll explain after the party," she promises, and still they dance.

* * *

The afterparty is a quiet affair, mostly cleaning aup, talking with family members, and planning Honey and Mori's graduation festivities. After about half an hour, Haruhi excuses herself to an outside balcony. The night air smells of flowers and fireworks dust and it entrances her.

"Haruhi?"

"Hi, Kyoya."

"You've dropped the _-senpai_ ," he observes with a smile. "Good."

She gently bumps her shoulder into his arm before looking up at him. "It just feels really weird to call you _-senpai_ when I see you as more than that, you know?"

Kyoya's dark eyes widen and his mouth forms a small 'o'. "...Really now?"

"I've been thinking about it since the beach house," she tells him. A cackle escapes her as he nearly trips over himself in surprise. "The Mighty Shadow King thrown off by a small tanuki, eh?"

Red-faced, Kyoya runs a hand through his hair. "You could say that, I suppose," he answers with a cough. "Logic doesn't exactly factor in wild cards like yourself."

* * *

Watching the two of them flirt on the balcony, Tamaki smiles. The rejection hurts - to deny that would be lying to himself - but their happiness has a way of easing the pain. "All's well that ends well," he sighs, and is surprised when Renge's fingers wrap around his own.


	3. Secrets Come Out

This chapter deals with anxiety, depression, and self-injury; skip it if that makes you uncomfortable or triggers you. The characters may be (/are probably) slightly out of character, but mental illness changes your character and how you see yourself.

* * *

It starts when Haruhi misses a cosplay day; these days are particularly helpful for working off her debt, so Kyoya makes a note in his ledger when she doesn't show. The other Hosts text her throughout the day, as do a select few of her regular guests. She doesn't reply to most of the messages, but she does call Kaoru's phone and asks to be put on speaker.

"Hi guys - and guests!" she says as loudly as she can, trying to be heard over the idle chatter. "I'm sorry I wasn't able to show up today; I wasn't feeling well and I thought it'd be best to stay home. I'll see you all tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay, Haruhi! Feel better soon!" five of the Hosts and the guests call out.

The twins hand the phone to Kyoya. "Get well soon, Haruhi. Let me know if you need a doctor, all right?"

He can almost see her blush through the phone. "Thanks, Senpai. I'll see you tomorrow. Bye."

* * *

True to her word, Haruhi returns the next day; the Club puts together a last-minute cosplay day. It's a cosplay they've already done - police officers - but they've modified the uniforms to be different colors based on rank from a video game the twins liked to play as children. Most of the guests flock to Haruhi, asking if she's okay and such.

"I'm fine, ladies. Thank you for thinking of me - how are all of you?"

The girls get hyper at being asked about themselves and their lives; Haruhi's grateful for the diversion. Customers change between classes, but the routine is the same: guests ask how she's doing, give her gifts (cards and her favorite 'commoner candy', mostly, with some bringing flowers), and she diverts the attention from herself.

At the end of the day, Kyoya makes another note in his ledger; this time, it has a dateless reminder. Talk to Haruhi.

"Wow, Haru-chan!" Honey chirps excitedly. "You got a lot of gifts and a **lot** of candy!"

She smiles. "You can have some of the candy if you want, I don't have room in my place for it, and it'll melt in the heat anyway."

The small third-year notices that something's off in her tone. "Are you sure, Haru-chan? Are you really okay?"

Her brown eyes widen just a fraction. _Damn these rich bastards and their perception_. "I'm fine, Honey-Senpai. I promise. I have to go study so I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Bye, Haruhi!" the twins and Tamaki yell as she leaves.

As she heads to the door, Kyoya catches her wrist and catches the almost-inaudible hiss that escapes her lips. He makes to say something but decides against it, and lets her go.

* * *

"Haruhi hasn't really been _Haruhi_ in a while," Ranka says over the phone as he gets ready for his nightshift. "I'm trying to get her to open up, Kyoya, but she's not budging. I'm worried about her, but I can't find any proof to get her to tell me what's wrong!" tears come to his eyes. "I'm her father, and I can't do a _damn thing_ for her! I'm sorry, Kyoya," he finishes with a groan. "I'm supposed to be the adult here, not you..."

It's been about a week since Haruhi missed a Club day but something's still wrong, and the Shadow King is on a mission.

"I'm worried as well, which is why I called," the black-haired teen confesses while laying on his bed. "Have you noticed anything strange? Changing in clothing and eating habits, things like that?"

Ranka's trust in this boy runs deep. "Now that you mention it, she's not been eating like she normally does, and she's been sleeping a lot more recently. Haruhi's also been more... Withdrawn, I guess. I just thought it was because of testing rigors, do you think it's depression?"

"Mixed with anxiety," Kyoya says with a solemn certainty. "I haven't seen her have anxiety symptoms myself, but the twins are keeping in touch. She had to excuse herself from class to go to the restroom today, which is rare for her. They said she was gone for about twenty minutes. I suspect other things, but I need to talk to her before I jump to any conclusions. I - " there's an abrupt pause as something occurs in the background.

He groans in frustration. "I hate to do this, but I have to go to a family function - _please_ feel free to call me any time, Ranka. Be safe; I'm doing my best to get a good team together for Haruhi."

"Thank you." Ranka hangs up and spends the next hour crying. He feels he's let Haruhi, Kotoko, _and_ Kyoya down.

* * *

The day after calling Ranka, Kyoya requests that the other Hosts go home early so he can stock inventory and set up for a midterm celebration. "Haruhi will stay behind and help me," he says, adjusting his glasses. "She needs to put some non-Hosting time into her debt."

Glad to be done early for once, the other Hosts leave with little argument. Tamaki makes a quip, but Mori pushes him from the room, and they all take a limousine to the Hitachiin mansion for a day of gaming and website updating.

It's under these circumstances - alone in Music Room #3, with no distractions - that Kyoya sees Haruhi have an attack.

* * *

They're setting up the buffet display when Haruhi starts hyperventilating.

"Haruhi, please put the plates on the table and sit on the couch," he instructs calmly. When she does as asked, he quickly locks the door. "Breathe, Haruhi."

"I-I-I- c-c-can't," she says through restricted air. "I-i-t h-h-h-h-hurts."

Kyoya kneels before her, gently placing a hand on each of her knees. "Look at me, Haruhi. Inhale through your nose for four counts; exhale through your mouth for the same."

She earnestly tries to do as he says, but her thoughts are racing. Her eyes dart everywhere and she's starting to shake. "I-i-i- d-d-d-don't think I-i-i-i-i c-c-c-c-can d-d-do this..."

"Try to keep eye contact with me. Do you think you can do that?" After she successfully meets his eyes for more than a minute, he silently demonstrates how he wants her to breathe. "It'll be a bit difficult at first, but it does help. I use this technique regularly when I'm under stress."

Her eyes widen. She hasn't thought of _Kyoya_ as being someone who has to cope with stress to this extent - he's her definition of the 'cool type' of man in every sense of the phrase. Somehow, knowing this helps him relaxes her a bit.

"Very good," he smiles. "The count really doesn't matter; it's the evenness of the breath that has the desired effect. Even numbers tend to be the most rhythmic," he continues conversationally. "I'm going to check your pulse now; may I see your left wrist, please?"

Haruhi flushes, but apprehensively gives him her arm while breathing. She looks away to avoid his nonverbal reaction.

* * *

When he pushes the sleeve back, he's upset - but not surprised - to see bandages. "When was the last time these were changed out?" he inquires mildly, noticing the faded color on the outer edges.

"A couple days ago... I kind of forgot, to be honest, because it doesn't hurt too bad."

"The breathing is helping you calm down, then?"

"Yeah, it is. Thank you, Kyoya."

He traces the bandages and finds the clip holding them together. He drops her arm for a moment and retrieves a medical kit from a nearby cabinet. "I'm going to have to take these off and change them; it may hurt a bit, if you've used adhesive."

"No, I just washed them with water and soap, used some anti-infectant stuff, then applied the bandages after drying my arm. I thought the chemicals in bandage adhesive would make it worse."

He looks solely at her arm as he unwraps the bandages. Hurt flashes across his face in spite of his mostly calm composure, and this is what prompts her to speak again.

"Kyoya...?"

"There's no infection, thankfully," he says slowly, putting the dirty bandages aside. "But I need to clean your arm before I can re-cover it. Walk with me to the sink, please."

She obliges silently, thankful that he's not yelling at her. "Kyoya, I - "

"You can explain after I finish what I'm doing, although I appreciate you wanting to disclose now."

The sheer _tenderness_ in how he holds her hand, in how he makes sure the water's not too hot for her skin... Something about it is reassuring. _He's a physician at heart_ , _**of course** he's going to have compassion in mending injuries_. _I wonder if he's ever seen anything like this, though._

"Remember the breathing I showed you," he interrupts her thoughts quietly. "It'll help you stay still while I apply the disinfectant and bandages."

Haruhi goes back to her four-count breaths and closes her eyes. She feels the disinfectant's sting, and whistles in relief when the new bandages are clipped. "Is this why you had the others leave early? How long have you - "

"Yes, and we can discuss the rest over dinner; where do you feel most comfortable eating?"

* * *

Per Haruhi's request, they have pizza delivered to her place. She's annoyed, yet touched, that he calls Ranka.

"Ranka, it's me. We're fine; Haruhi and I are having pizza at your apartment, is that all right?" There's a short pause in the conversation. "Yes, everything will be fine - I'll update you later. Do you feel uncomfortable with me staying the night here and - ?"

" **Of course not!** " Ranka yells hotly, loud enough for Haruhi to hear. His voice drops again, saying something she can't quite hear.

She looks at Kyoya quizzically when his cheeks gain a pink tinge. "You're welcome, Ranka. I'll call you when I get home tomorrow. Good night."

" **Good night Haruhi-chan! I love you!** "

"I love you too, Dad," she answers. "Good night."

When the call ends, Kyoya gives her a steely look accompanied by a quirked eyebrow.

"All right, all right," she puts her hands up in a defensive gesture. "I'll explain now. Make yourself comfortable, we're gonna be here for a while."

"I'm staying the night here anyway; we have time." He can't help but chuckle at the heat rising to her face.

* * *

"So when did all of this start?" He questions between bites of pizza.

"About a month ago; that's when the nightmares came."

"Nightmares? What about?"

She looks away in shame, tears pricking at her eyes. "Do... You promise not to laugh?"

Kyoya's thrown off when she asks. "Of course I won't laugh."

"My mom died peacefully in the hospital, but in my sleep, it's worse than that; most of the nightmares are about Mom, but some... Some of them are about the Host Club."

Before he can stop himself, he takes her hand. "My condolences for your loss, Haruhi. What about the Host Club? What happens?"

Haruhi's grip isn't quite a squeeze, but is firm. "Something happens to each Host. Death, moving out of the country, disinheritance, _something_... One by one, until all of you disappear and I'm all alone. Alone on a wide, wide sea; never a saint took pity - "

"-On my soul in agony. Coleridge is one of my favorite English poets," he finishes. "Does being alone scare you?"

"Yeah. I should be used to it, with Dad working nights and not having had many friends 'til I met you lot, but it still bothers me." She sighs. "This time of year is always really bad for me, too; exams are _hell_ , and Mom's birthday and anniversary are back-to-back."

"Do you always resort to self-injury?" Kyoya asks, rubbing circles on her hand with his thumb.

"Oh, no, this is the first time the pain's ever been this bad," her voice is surprisingly candid considering the seriousness of their discussion. "About the cutting: it only happened twice - the cosplay day that I missed, and then the day before yesterday. That's the last time I got new bandages; thank you for changing them out."

"You're welcome. What caused you to cut?"

"The first time was after I got called to the academic office... My grades have been slipping and if I'm not careful, I'll lose my scholarship. The stress of it put me in a panic, and the next thing I know, I'm bleeding," she shakes her head. "The second time - day before yesterday - I don't even know what triggered it! I was crying and grabbed something and... I'm smarter than that! I don't know how this got so out of hand."

She takes a breath before continuing. "Now here you are, in my living room, dealing with my stupidity... You have probably a thousand different things to do, but you're stuck babysitting me instead. Better you than Tamaki-senpai, though."

He chuckles, stretching his legs. "I'm going to respectfully disagree with you on that, Haruhi. Here I am, in your living room, spending my free time enjoying your company - although the circumstances are less than ideal. Here I am, doing what I can to be of assistance. Here I am, checking to make sure one of my Hosts is well - although your Hosting is not even _close_ to being my main priority."

Helping her stand, he concludes, "Here I am, falling in love with you, despite my efforts to not be so foolish."

* * *

Haruhi gapes at his back as he walks into the kitchen. _Falling in love... With me? He's almost got to be having me on._ The girl runs a hand through her hair, looking toward her mother's shrine. _Is there love in Heaven, Mom? Is this what it feels like?_ She's startled from thought when Kyoya's hand clasps her shoulder.

"You should probably get showered and go to sleep," he tells her. "Before that, I'm going to need to give you new bandages again."

As they enter the bathroom, she hops onto the sink. Wordlessly, she hands him her arm.

"These are healing quite nicely," he says conversationally. "I don't think there will be any scarring, either. You did a decent job with giving the wounds the proper care they need."

Silence reigns for a few minutes before she speaks. "Ah... Kyoya? You're not going to tell the others about this, are you? The other Hosts?"

"While I believe the Club can be a formidable support system, I'm leaving that to your discretion. I'm not one to break confidences when it's not needed."

She bites her lip. "What about Dad?"

He stops what he's doing to adjust his glasses again before rubbing an ointment on each individual cut. "Ranka needs to be informed; I'll call him shortly. I trust you're not planning on harming yourself again?"

"Definitely not."

"Good."

Haruhi looks from her arm, to Kyoya's glasses, and back again. "Kyoya... You're not really falling in love with me, are you?"

The Shadow King flushes, though doesn't miss a beat with what he's doing. "I am. All of us in the Club have romantic feelings for you to some degree."

"That explains Tamaki-senpai and Hikaru's obnoxious behavior... But Mori-senpai? Honey-senpai? And you? Totally not expected."

He just laughs as he finishes clipping the bandages. "In all honesty, Haruhi, I wasn't expecting it either. I can't even tell you exactly when I started feeling this way. I know you're not in a healthy state for any sort of relationship - there's no honor in admitting feelings for gain... I just thought you'd like to know that I _do_ care, although it often doesn't seem so." As though she were a porcelain doll, he helps her down from the sink. "Good night, Haruhi."

She hugs him from behind with a quiet fierceness lacing her voice. "Thank you, Kyoya. Can you look at me for a minute, please?" When he does, she kisses his cheek and shyly pulls back to look up at him. "You're right: I'm not in a particularly good place for any sort of relationship right now - and I thank you for respecting that. But... When I heal a bit - with time, therapy, whatever helps in a healthy way - I'd like to figure _us_ out."

His jaw drops a bit. "Really now? _That's_ an interesting notion..."

"Yeah, really - if you're willing to give _a commoner_ the time to wait," she nudges him playfully. "Well, good night, Kyoya."

"Good night, Haruhi. We'll go over therapists that specialize in grief counseling and anxiety tomorrow, all right?"

"All right, and thank you. Now shoo, I need to shower." The grin on his face as she closes the bathroom door makes her night.

* * *

"I've made a possibly grave error," Kyoya tells Ranka over the phone. "I told Haruhi that I'm falling in love with her."

" **Eeeeeeeeeee!** Kyoya, that's great!" Ranka (drunkenly) squeals. "What did she say?"

"She said that, although she's not able to be in a relationship right now, she'd like to - and I quote - 'figure us out', referring to our relationship when she's feeling better."

" **That's so great!** " he laughs. " **I'm so happy for you, Kyoya-kun!** "

"Nothing's official yet, but I appreciate the sentiment."

There's some drunken chatter in the background before Ranka talks again. "I have to go to bed now, Kyoya-kun! Don't do anything foolish with my daughter! Good night!"

"Good night, Ranka."

* * *

The next morning, Kyoya wakes up to wide brown eyes and a homemade breakfast.

"It's a little after ten," she hands him his glasses. "I know you're not an early riser, but I... Would really like to start the process of getting well today. Sorry."

"Don't apologize; I'm just glad you're feeling well."

The two teens talk over their meal and Kyoya's laptop, preparing for her recovery process and their potential future.


	4. Playlist for Kyoya

A/N: This chapter is a sequel to chapter 1, "Playlist for Haruhi". Hope you enjoy it! I don't own any of the songs mentioned here, all trademarks and properties belong to their copyright holders.

The lullaby referred to is "Green Island Serenade" by Vienna Teng, and I'm taking the translation directly from a video of a show she did where she explains this particular line before performing.

* * *

 _Another set of exams, another late night studying in Music Room #3._

After having dinner, the Hosts get back to studying. It's around one a.m. when Haruhi feels a tap on her shoulder. She starts and puts a hand over her heart when she realizes who it is. "What's going on, Kyoya-senpai?"

Kyoya chuckles sheepishly. "I forgot my music player at home; may I borrow yours for an hour or so? Silence can be deafening at times."

Remembering a certain song on his device makes her flush deeply. "Here you go, and here's the charger - now we're even on the music player front," she laughs softly.

"Thank you, Haruhi."

"No problem," she says, turning back to her homework after handing him her music player and charger. "Enjoy it - oh!"

"Hm?"

"Feel free to browse my playlists - that's how most of my music is organized."

"Ah, all right. Thank you again."

* * *

Curiosity piqued, Kyoya clicks on Haruhi's Playlist folder on her music player. At once, he sees several playlists relating to the Host Club; one for each Host. Amused, he goes to the aptly titled "Annoying Boss" playlist for Tamaki. He's a bit confused at what he finds.

 _Lots of club music and sped-up remixes... But nothing romantic. Odd._

The next playlist is titled "Devilish Twins", and has many songs used in fashion shows. The transition between Hikaru's songs and Kaoru's is simple, yet stunning, and accurately reflects the differences she sees between them. Honey's playlist - "Sweet and Spice" - has typically cute songs; the Japanese version a kids' dance, themes from slice-of-life anime, and 'A Spoonful of Sugar' from _Mary Poppins._ Mori's playlist, named "Mori?", has songs about protecting loved ones and martial art movie soundtracks.

Kyoya's eyes widen when he sees the last playlist: "Silent Affection". _Perhaps I'm being presumptuous in assuming that this one is for me, but all of the other Hosts already have theirs..._ Haruhi's dozed off on her textbooks, and the others are getting ready to rest. His heart races as he clicks his name.

* * *

The first song that plays is a Chinese lullaby. He wonders why she's chosen this one until he hears a line he pauses to search on the Internet; the artist translates it as "even the palm tree's long shadows cannot conceal my feeling for you". _That's surprisingly poetic, even for Haruhi. I underestimated her tenderness._

A few minutes later, Liszt's _Liebestraum_ plays, followed by Chopin's _Raindrop Prelude_ and a nocturne. They're beautiful choices, but the Shadow King is still wondering where this is going. "Let's see what's next," he whispers as he hits the button. Though usually graceful and composed, he almost falls out of his chair when he hears the stanza before the first chorus.

When it's finished, any doubt about the intent of this playlist is gone. Kyoya just has to figure out if it really is meant for him. He takes his earbuds out and plugs her music player into an outlet where it won't get broken in the chaos of breakfast, showers, and getting to classes. Kyoya finishes his studying with a ledger note to confront her about their game of musical tag when he gets the chance.

* * *

It takes a few days of cat-and-mouse, but Kyoya finally gets her alone during trash clean-up after Host Club Hours. He's taken aback when she initiates the conversation.

"You found my Hosts playlists, didn't you?" Haruhi asks. " _Silent Affection_ was the only name I could think of for yours, although it's a bit cheesy. You've been acting weird around me since you borrowed my music player the other night, that's why I bring it up."

"I did find the playlists, and I meant to ask you who that one was intended for, but you beat me to it." He shakes his head with a smile. "I didn't expect you to like American pop music so much."

She avoids that comment with another question. "Where do we go from here? We obviously have feelings for each other, but between the other Hosts and my debt, this will be complicated."

"Genuine romance usually is," he concedes. "To begin, I suggest a date. My treat."

"Can I finally get some damn fancy tuna?"

"Of course we can. Saturday at five sound good?"

* * *

"You owe me 3,609 yen, Mori," Kaoru says triumphantly. "Pay up."

Begrudgingly, the third-year pays his wager. "How did you know?"

"Haruhi and Kyoya-senpai have been acting weird around each other for a few weeks, so we figured they liked each other. Turns out we were right," the twins say in sync. "You okay, boss?"

"My little girl is all grown up!" the blonde cries dramatically, falling to the ground. "All grown up and in love!"

"Stop calling me your little girl!"


	5. Serenade

A/N: This chapter is inspired by Chopin's 'Raindrop Prelude', and the idea of Kyoya serenading Haruhi with a piano.

* * *

It's a quiet day in Music Room #3; guests come in between classes, but with holidays coming, their visits are cut short. Everyone's surprised when Kyoya takes a seat at the piano.

"I didn't realize Kyoya-senpai played," Haruhi mutters. _There's a lot I don't know about the other Hosts._

"Oh yeah," Kaoru appears beside her, propping an arm on her head. "He started playing even before the Boss."

"And he's really good," Hikaru finishes. "Some people say he's even better than the Boss."

Kyoya starts playing a piece by Liszt, and Haruhi recognizes it off the bat. "Is that Hungarian Rhapsody No. 2?"

"Yes it is; I committed it to memory the summer before middle school. I had a lot of free time on my hands. I'm surprised you recognize it, though..."

"I use instrumental music to study and clean; Liszt is one of my favorite composers - of course I'd know his most popular piece!"

The twins heckle her for being a 'nerd'; Tamaki is excited over having a 'cultured commoner' in his presence. Mori shushes them so Honey can take his nap.

* * *

After seeing some of his own guests, Kyoya plays the third movement of Beethoven's "Moonlight Sonata". Haruhi notices that he plays differently than Tamaki; where the blonde Club King plays almost romantically, the Shadow King plays as though he's wrestling his demons.

The two of them are alone in the corner of the room where the piano is. "You play beautifully," she tells him with a blush. "I prefer how you play over how Tamaki-senpai plays... You're more... Honest, somehow. Ah, that probably seems stupid, doesn't it?"

While playing a left-handed phrase, he adjusts his glasses with his right hand. "No, it makes sense. I appreciate the compliment; most people think I play too roughly, that I'm too aggressive. Our guests tend to prefer hearing Tamaki because they like his romanticism. Do you have a favorite piece?"

"Chopin's _Raindrop Prelude_ ," she answers immediately. "Ironic, I know, but it just conveys emotions so well."

Grinning, he switches keys and starts playing. Haruhi closes her eyes and smiles.


	6. Resolution

A/N: This is a sequel to chapter 3, "Secrets Come Out". I'm kinda stuck on other prompts, so I'm coming back to this. Enjoy! (Also, Hana is a name I've made up for a guest, because "a guest", "the guest", etc. gets old)

* * *

It's been a few weeks since Haruhi started therapy; the other Hosts can see that she's changed. Although she's still blunt with her words, her self-perception has improved and she's more understanding of people's emotions.

"Haru-chan!" Honey jumps on her back, nuzzling her cheek. "You look so happy today! Happier than you have in a while!"

"I am," she answers, adjusting her arms to give him a piggy-back ride. "Counseling has helped me a lot."

"You've been doing counseling?" he asks. "For what?"

Haruhi laughs sheepishly. "I accepted my mother's death but never really... Processed it in a healthy way. A friend of mine - " she gives a glance toward Kyoya and Tamaki, who are discussing club budgets - "helped me realize that bottling everything up isn't healthy. I also get help with managing academic stress."

"Academic stress? As smart as you are?" Renge's surprise confuses the newest Host.

"In order to keep attending Ouran Academy, I have to be first in my class. It can be overwhelming at times."

"Oh! I see. Who's your biggest competition?" the Club manager asks dramatically.

"In my class? I'm not sure, actually... But guests are coming in soon, so we should probably get ready."

* * *

After Club activities, Haruhi and Kyoya stay behind for clean-up duty. With everyone else gone to meetings or practices, they can talk candidly, which the Shadow King is thankful for. "Haruhi?"

She only replies after putting up a particularly fragile tea-set. "Yes, Kyoya?"

"Are you all right? You're working more slowly than usual today."

The first-year closes the cabinet door and sits in a chair beside him. "Just a bit lost in thought, I guess."

Kyoya shuts his laptop and turns to face her. "What's on your mind?"

"Do... You feel the same way about me as you did the night we had pizza at my place?" she looks at him, nervous and a touch embarrassed.

"Yes, I do."

Haruhi sighs in relief and takes his hand. "I know it's only been a few weeks, but... I told my counselor about the Host Club. I told her how I feel about you. Once I said it out loud, I knew I had to ask. I've never dated or anything. I'm not sure how this is supposed to work, but you're the first person who's given me reason to try."

Something shifts in the air between them, and the Shadow King smiles. "A few weeks can make a world of difference, but don't feel rushed on my account. I'm not going anywhere."

"I don't feel rushed at all - you've been respectful and understanding, giving me the time I need. I think I'm ready to date you now."

Kyoya brings her hand to his lip and graces it with a kiss. "Thank you," he says, "for wanting to give me a chance."


	7. Unexpected Comfort

A/N: This chapter is inspired by a "kiss prompt" meme on Tumblr, as well as an episode 8 what-if. Enjoy!

* * *

As Haruhi shakes from fear, Kyoya grabs the comforter from the floor and wraps it around them. He moves to where he's facing her, a shy smile on his face.

"Situation-specific acrophobia."

"Huh?"

"I suffer from situation-specific acrophobia. Flying is fine, but being in high places and looking down is absolute chaos. It's one of the most illogical things about myself."

She giggles a bit. "I hate ducks. They're loud and vicious; I've never been attacked by one, though."

A crash of thunder causes her to squeak and close her eyes. She's thankful she's not alone to deal with the storm.

Kyoya puts his hands on her shoulders. "I'm not a big fan of seafood. I'll eat it, but it's not my preference."

"We're at a beach. _Your family's beach_... Yet you don't like seafood?" she blinks, confused.

He shrugs. "The aftertaste bothers me, for some reason. So does the mess."

Lightning flashes, and Kyoya pulls Haruhi to him. Instinct seems to guide him now, prompts him to rub her back as she cries. He asks if music helps her. When she nods, he clears his throat.

"I'm not the best singer," he apologizes. "Unfortunately, I don't have a music player, so my voice is all I can give."

* * *

Kyoya sings a nameless lullaby until Haruhi falls asleep on his chest. He takes a moment to observe her: guard down, eyes closed, she's much smaller and more feminine than in her waking hours. Satisfied that she's at ease, he removes himself from their cocoon and opens the door so he can carry her to her bed. It takes a few minutes to get there and another few to nudge her door open without waking her. When he succeeds, he lays her on the bed and tucks her into the comforter.

She groans a bit and rolls so that she's facing him, but doesn't seem to wake up. Kyoya takes another look at the 'secret princess', acutely aware of the feelings arising in his heart. He bends to kiss her forehead. "You will never know," he whispers.

As he turns to head to his room, Haruhi grabs his hand.

"G'night Kyoya," she says sleepily. "M... M... I... Like you. Thank you."

She drops his hand and instantly drifts back to sleep. The Shadow King's eyes glow with wonder at how things have turned out.

"Like me? That's an interesting notion, in its own way."


	8. Snapshots

A/N: This chapter is one of those "listen to songs and write" prompts; a bit different from what I've written so far. I hope you enjoy it!  
Disclaimer: I own none of the songs whose titles are mentioned here, and make no profit from their use.

* * *

 **i. High by the Beach - Lana del Rey**

Every instance in which Haruhi reflects on her moment with Kyoya at the Okinawa beach house, she wonders what could have happened. Tamaki had - to her inner dismay - interrupted their conversation, and Kyoya walked out. Her fear of the storm had stopped her from going after the Shadow King, and a regret clenches her heart.

She looks at him when she doesn't think he's watching. She sees him and sees _through_ him. Kyoya's attitude toward her hasn't changed outwardly, but she's astute enough to see the inner differences. He smiles at her more, and is more prone to adjusting his glasses when he's with her. The third Ootori is not a man of wasting words, but his subtleties say more than his tongue ever will.

They remember, and they look at each other with could-have-been eyes.

* * *

 **ii.** **Someone New - Hozier**

Kyoya treads his feelings for Haruhi with trepidation. There is a certain risk in falling for her, he knows: the other Hosts love her in their own way, and a wrong move could cost him all of his friendships. She's a wild card in their lives; she's someone new. Despite being a self-proclaimed egoist, Kyoya pushes his emotions to the side for their sakes. He is an Ootori, and cannot afford to be undone by a commoner girl (who, really, is anything but common).

Despite his knowledge of her, he's surprised when she kisses his cheek and hands him a red rose.

* * *

 **iii.** **Lithium Flower - Scott Matthew**

The twins treat the Hosts to a road trip to a private lakefront property. While the others enjoy themselves on the water, Haruhi stays on the porch and studies her maths. Tamaki and Honey desperately try to get her to the water, but she refuses.

"I have to keep up my grades, senpais," she says firmly. "I don't want to lose my scholarship because the twins decided to follow a whim."

"But Haru-chan~!"

"Don't you 'but Haru-chan' me, Honey-senpai. I don't surf or do other water-sports, and I need to keep my scholarship if I want to stay in the Club."

Kyoya decides to go to her aid, firmly steering the other two back to the water. "Sorry about that, Haruhi. I really wasn't prepared either."

She ignores him for her maths problem - or correcting it. "Damn! I can't get this problem, and I know it'll be on the exam."

"Let me see," he says.

They spend hours talking about concepts, lines, and formulas. Finally she starts getting problems right on the first try. Smiling, Haruhi thanks him for teaching her how to surf in maths and saving her stress.

* * *

 **iv. Bright - Echosmith**

Haruhi's come to realize that they each Host loves her in his own way. Tamaki, in his schemes and hugs. Honey, in offering her time with Usa-chan and sharing cake. Mori, in the way he pets her hair and helps her reach high places. Hikaru and Kaoru, in their mischievous games. But when it comes to the Shadow King... That love is something else.

Kyoya shows his love for her through small gestures. Ootoro when she's having a rough study session, gifts for her mother's grave, a touch to the shoulder when she feels down. Ever silent, ever believing - it's that love and that honesty that Haruhi eventually falls in love with herself. Their confession is a quiet affair in her apartment, when he comes to protect her from the oncoming storm.

Her world is brighter because of the Host Club. But only Kyoya puts stars in her eyes.

* * *

 **v.** **Plainsong - The Cure**

Kyoya knows that Haruhi is a simple girl. Sometimes even naive. He also knows that he's her match in every way that matters, and it hurts him to push his affections aside. They could be beautiful together, he knows, but he tries to let her go. She would receive harsh treatment in marrying an elite, especially one such as himself from an empire family.

Haruhi chooses him despite the risks (or perhaps _in spite_ of them). She sees through his fear, and his heart feels light within his chest.


	9. Mistletoe

A/N: Sorry it's been a while! Pregnancy and school have been keeping me busy! This is a Christmas prompt - I know it's really early but I like the idea.

* * *

"Haru-chan, Haru-chan! There's mistletoe above your head!" Honey bounces excitedly, pointing to the peak of the Music Room doorway after club hours.

"What!?" Haruhi asks, looking up. Her face slowly turns an interesting shade of red. "I'm not kissing anyone - not happening."

"It's Christmas, Haruhi," Kaoru tells her. "You kinda have to, since it's there."

"Not happening!" she yells, making for her room.

Kyoya grabs her hand from behind. "Now's the perfect time, Haruhi..."

"Kyoya, I - "

She can't say anything else, because Kyoya's stolen her voice with a kiss.


	10. Embrace

A/N: Been busy with school and pregnancy! Inspired by an OTP prompt on Tumblr.

* * *

Not many things surprise Kyoya Ootori, but when he feels arms wrap around his chest, he tenses up. "Hello there."

"You looked lonely," Haruhi says simply, putting her chin on his shoulder. She knows Kyoya isn't used to affection, so his lack of response doesn't bother her. "It's a look that doesn't suit you."

"Hm."

Kaoru walks into Music Room #3, grinning when he sees the two. "Haruhi, how come you never give _me_ any hugs, but you're hugging that cold, cold Shadow King~!"

"You don't tend to look lonely, Kaoru. Hikaru's usually all over you..."

"True, but he's a few minutes behind me, it was his turn to clean the classroom. Quit changing the subject, though! You two are cute. Now if only that Shadow King would show you that he cares~!"

Kyoya adjusts his glasses and touches Haruhi's hands. She makes to move away, but he leans into her just slightly. "Shut up, Kaoru."

The redhead snickers. "I was joking, but it's nice to see you so happy."

Haruhi smiles. "Thanks, Kaoru."


	11. Sun, Sea, and Confessions

Two a.m. in the Hitachiin mansion greets Kyoya Ootori with a glaring red error on his computer screen. Giving a slight groan of frustration, the Shadow King decides to take a break for a glass of water. He walks down the stairs quietly, only stopping when he hears his name called through an open door.

Peeking in, Kyoya sees Haruhi curled under a duvet, softly muttering in her sleep. He shrugs, making to leave when she says his name again.

"I think Kyoya-senpai is amazing. I love him!"

He flushes and turns to leave. _Don't be stupid, Ootori. Sleep-talking isn't indicative of a person's true feelings; it's nothing to get worked up over_. Despite repeating this in his thoughts, he uses refills his glass of water: one to quench his thirst, one he pours over his face to try and ease the heat.

* * *

After a buffet of crab and fancy tuna at a beachside restaurant, Kyoya is noticeably flustered. "Excuse me," he says, standing up. "I'm going to walk the beach to clear my head."

"Well _that_ was weird..." Hikaru tilts his head, confused.

"Yeah, he's been off all day," Tamaki responds worriedly. "You think one of us should go talk to him?"

Haruhi walks down the steps leading to the beach. "I'll talk to him, I'm sure everything will be fine."

* * *

She doesn't expect him to start so intensely when she catches up to him. "Kyoya, are you okay?"

He adjusts his glasses. "I'm a bit... Confused, I guess, but otherwise no worse for the wear."

"Confused about what? Maybe I can help...?"

Kyoya looks at her nervously. "Haruhi, did you know that you talk in your sleep?"

"My dad's told me about it, why? Did I say something offensive?"

He laughs. "Not offensive, but... Personal. I only overheard you because I was getting water in the middle of the night."

Haruhi blushes, wondering what exactly she's said to get _Kyoya_ , of all people, so worked up. She bites her lower lip, inwardly debating whether she should ask or not. _On the one hand, if it didn't bother him he wouldn't be so flustered... On the other hand, I know he's not angry about_ _whatever I - **oh**_... her thoughts trail off as she recalls her dream. She rubs her head with a groan.

"Kyoya, did I happen to confess feelings for you when you overheard me?"

"Yes."

"And you've been so flustered - especially around me - because you don't know how to respond?"

"You could say that. I know sleep-talking isn't indicative of one's feelings, but when it's a love confession people's minds are prone to wonder."

Haruhi nods in understanding. "I can see how that can be a source of confusion, and I'm sorry. But I do..." she pauses, considering her words. _Love_ isn't a word that she can use easily around Kyoya, so she expresses the sentiment in a different way. "...I do care deeply for you. Most ardently."

Kyoya smiles shyly and holds her hand. "And I care deeply for you, Haruhi."

* * *

When the new couple makes their way back to the restaurant, they make sure to walk apart and appear as though nothing has changed. Kyoya's a man of business and discretion, after all - he doesn't want any disruption among the Host Club members. Haruhi understands this and follows his lead.

It's only when they're seen holding hands on the beach at sunrise that anyone else figures it out... But Honey and Mori are good enough to not say anything, having suspected this development for months.


	12. Confessions Abroad

A/N: This fic takes place post-anime; Haruhi and Kyoya are both studying at Harvard (Haruhi's going into law and Kyoya is going into medicine with a biochemistry emphasis). Tamaki's in France with his mother, and the others travel with their families in their respective fields of fashion and martial arts.

* * *

Haruhi is in her dorm room, working on a term paper when her phone buzzes with a text from Kyoya. It's 9:00 pm on a Friday and she's surprised he's stopped working long enough to send her a ping.

 _are you awake?_

 _working on a paper._ _what can i do for you?_

 _...nothing. i'm sorry to have bothered you. try to get some sleep._

 _kyo, you're never a bother. what's wrong?_

 _nothing. i just couldn't sleep._

He stares at her last text for five minutes before she quadruple texts him.

 _kyo._ _kyo._ _KYO!_

 _aight. ill be at yours in 10._

 _would be 5 but i'm bringing food and a movie._

 _real food, not that crappy takeout next door to you._

Sometimes he wonders what he would do without her. Since they came to the United States, they've been nearly inseparable except when they have classes.

"Oy, let me in!" When he opens his apartment door, Haruhi almost falls in because the bags are throwing off her balance. She restocks his near-bare cabinets and refrigerator, then preheats the oven. "I brought a lasagna that I can just warm up; hope that's okay," she says while sliding a foiled container in and setting the oven timer. "Should be good to go in about ten minutes. Now, tell me what's going on, Kyo."

Almost a year after their arrival (two years after Haruhi's graduation), it _still_ surprises him that he's no longer _Kyoya-sempai_. In many cases, he's no longer even _Kyoya_ to Haruhi, but _Kyo_. She's the only one who calls him that, too - yet sometimes it shocks him to hear _Kyo_ in reference to himself. At first they tried to not be too close - there were multiduninous connection opportunities here after all - but over time they figured that networking together worked best for them, and helped them become closer. Now here she is, flopped comfortably on his couch, head leaning over the arm and looking at him expectantly.

"I just... I have a bad case of jitters tonight, for some reason. I have biochem and research methods exams on Monday - among other exams through the rest of next week - and I am beyond prepared for them, but my nerves seem to feel shot. Trying to study hasn't helped much, and as you saw my cabinets were practically empty, so I couldn't really eat either." His phone buzzes with a text, and just then he pinches the bridge of his nose. "My father."

"Surely he can wait til morning. Here, give me that. I'll turn both of our phones off that way you can blame me for it honestly," Haruhi takes his phone and shuts it down before turning off her own and placing both devices out of easy reach. "He's on top of you again, isn't he?"

Kyoya's sigh is one of the most heartbreaking things she's ever heard. "Yes."

"You're paying for your own schooling, and on top of that, you're still top of your class even with all the business moves you've been making over the last year! What else does he have to complain about?"

"I really don't know. I looked at the text and it wasn't urgent, so I guess he just wants me to do more."

Haruhi huffs as she walks into the kitchen to pull out the lasagna. "You can't do more, or give more, when you're empty, Kyo. I'll make your plate, you just lay back and try to unwind a little."

He sits at the bar next to the kitchen and puts his head in his hands. "The last thing I am is a quitter, but I sometimes wish I didn't need to fight so hard just because I'm the third son and youngest child overall. I'm _exhausted_."

"It's okay to be exhausted, Kyo," she says, setting the plates down to rub his shoulders. "It's okay. You need to eat, your blood sugar is probably low on top of your hypotension."

"Thanks, Haru. You're a life-saver."

They eat in silence for a few minutes before Haruhi speaks. "It's because I love you, you know."

Kyoya's eyes widen and he almost chokes on his water. " _What_?"

She walks around the bar to face him. "I love you. You've got to know that by now - after everything we've been through, especially in the last year, I thought it'd be obvious."

 _Blunt as always, this one_. "I just... You surprised me. I never thought I'd receive my first serious love confession while eating lasagna in an apartment in the United States, lamenting my station within my family - and no, my guests from the Host Club don't count. That was all a flight of fancy."

"I know," Haruhi says, putting her hand on his. "I really do love you, Kyo. Those years we had in the Host Club, and then we've been within walking distance of each other since we came here. I was terrified to come to the States, especially by myself! I would've managed, but having you here has made the experience so much better than I could have hoped for. Thank you."

He smiles. "You're welcome, and I love you too, Haru. Thank you for restocking my cabinets - make sure to leave me the receipts so I can pay you back."

"You don't have to - "

"Haruhi, it's okay. I want to. Because I love you, and the food I can make with what you've brought will last us a month."

She just laughs as they clean up the dishes.

* * *

The movie Haruhi's brought with her is a campy animated musical. "This is one we can talk over and not really have to pay attention to," she answers his silent question. "We can also just stream something - whatever you want."

"Campy musical is fine by me; there's ice-cream in the freezer if you'd like."

Grinning, Haruhi dives into the freezer and pulls out a tub of her favorite flavor. "I thought I finished this!"

Kyoya smiles. "You did, but I bought another one; I figured you would want more."

"You figured right, thank you," she says, grabbing a spoon before curling up next to her best friend. "Thank you for texting me. It's nice to get a break from case analysis... Business law is definitely _not_ my strong suit."

"Thanks for coming over. As much as I may miss Tamaki and the others, your presence is more... Grounding. Helps settle my nerves."

"I'm glad I can help in some way. I do need to point out something though, just so we're on the same page. When I said I love you, I meant," she pauses, face flushed suddenly, "I meant that I'm _in love_ with you. I mean I love you as my best friend too, but lately I've realized that what I feel goes beyond that. It's... Deep. I completely understand if you don't feel the same way, but I wanted to let you know what I intended to say."

"I'm in love with you as well. That's part of why my father's harassment bothers me so much more now. Whatever I feel for you just will not be enough to cause him to see merit in us having a romantic relationship. I wish I wasn't still tied to him, Haru, but my entire future - "

"I know. I know that to your family - to all of you guys' families - I'm just a commoner. I also know that I am extremely valuable and intelligent, and you can never have too much intelligence where the law is concerned, right?"

He takes the opportunity to kiss her lips softly. When she relaxes into him, he moves her ice-cream and pulls her closer. _It looks like I've finally climbed the other side of that wall_.


	13. Assault

**A/N:** This chapter covers sexual assault and the aftermath of it, and is based on my own experiences with being raped. Skip this if it's a topic that bothers or upsets you in any way. The guys' reactions to this, especially Kyoya's, is based on what guy friends told me when I started being open about the situation.

* * *

"Ms. Fujioka; I'm sorry to have to meet you under these circumstances. I am doctor Yuuichi Ootori."

 _Of **course** Dad would bring me to an Ootori hospital. Great. As if my night wasn't bad enough_. "Nice to meet you, Dr. Ootori. How's your shift?"

Yuuichi tilts his head, confused at the deflection. "Never mind me, Haruhi. How are you? What exams have been done so far?"

Ranka speaks here. "They've taken some swabs and did photographic documentation, in case she decides to pursue legal recourse... Did they do anything else while I was gone?"

"Pap smear... It hurt _really_ bad."

Yuuichi groans, knuckling his forehead. "Can you give me the name of the nurse who performed the pap? I had planned to do it myself after discussing the reasons for it with you personally, and after administration of pain medication. On behalf of the Ootori Group, I promise we can grant you financial compensation and the nurse will be dealt with accordingly."

"Her name was... Aiko I think," Ranka says. "She was extremely rude, as well."

The doctor bows from the waist. "My apologies, Mr. Fujioka. She will face consequences in short order - ah, Kyoya, I was wondering where you went."

"Yuuichi, I was - _Haruhi_?"

 _No! **No**!_ Haruhi's mind goes into a panic. "I was just... Getting a follow-up exam, Senpai. From my physical at the beginning of the school year."

"Brother, let's step - "

Kyoya's eyes narrow. "With all those bruises? Haruhi, I really thought you would have learned to trust me by now. What happened?"

" _Kyoya._ In the hallway, with me, _now_."

When the door closes behind the two brothers, Haruhi crumples into herself and cries. _I didn't want him - any of them - to know_.

Kyoya is livid when they've found an empty room to talk in. "I've been shadowing you for hours and you couldn't be bothered to tell me that she's here... For something _serious_ , nonetheless! I can understand the potential conflict of interest, but that would cross over into you being her treating - "

"Her father requested an Ootori, Kyoya. As her father, he has the right to sign forms stating those risks on her behalf. I assure you, he was well-informed on our policies and he requested an Ootori anyway. His reason was... Well, you. He knows you and Haruhi are close, Kyoya. That's why he brought her to an Ootori hospital to begin with! He felt she was safest here, considering the... Delicate nature of her visit."

"What do you mean 'delicate nature'? What's wrong with Haruhi!?"

"You know I can't tell you that. You're not yet a physician, Brother. To tell you would be to break my oaths, but I can say this: she's considering legal recourse in regards to what has happened. She will probably tell you if you're the only other one in the room."

"Fine."

* * *

About three hours later, Kyoya knocks on Haruhi's hospital room door before peeking in. It's me. I haven't told the others you're here... What happened?"

She bows her head, feeling self-conscious. "Oh hi; Dad went home to try and sleep since he knows you're here. About what happened: I don't want to talk about it, so don't ask."

"I can't help you if you don't let me. I _want_ to help you. Please. I won't tell the others."

"Kyoya, it just happened a few hours ago. I need time to process it."

He puts a hand to his chin and considers her carefully, analyzing all the facts. _She's covered in bruises, her smile doesn't quite reach her eyes, Yuuichi said she's here under a 'delicate nature' visit, she isn't very forthcoming about what happened but is considering legal re... Oh... Oh **no**. I am going to **kill** whoever did this to her! _ "Haruhi, feel free to yell at me for asking this, but... Were you raped?"

Haruhi's refusal to meet his eyes is all the answer he needs, but she confirms it anyway. "I am so ashamed and embarrassed, Kyoya. Yes, I know my legal rights and am planning to pursue charges upon the suspect if I can get the police to take me seriously, but I just - " she sobs, a strangled noise tearing out of her throat, "- I'm scared! I am terrified, vulnerable, I've been prodded and examined in every place you can imagine on a human body! I didn't want anyone to know, Kyoya. I'm so angry!"

"Sans leaving you alone, what can I do for you? Order sushi, just stay here quietly... What do you need from me right now?"

She shrugs weakly. "I was kind of hoping 'leave me alone' would be an option, but since it's not, I am _famished_. Is there anything I can afford in this cafet - _oh no. How are we going to afford this_!? We're going to be paying the bills for this for years!"

"Ah, no. I will cover your medical costs, including post-discharge care and therapy. You already have enough burden; I refuse to have you take on any more when I can easily afford it out of my own business ventures without issue."

"But what about - "

"Your debt to the Host Club has been paid off. You had your one thousandth customer yesterday."

She is _ecstatic_. "Really!? And you're serious about helping me with these medical bills?"

Kyoya holds one of her hands in both of his. "I've seldom ever been more serious about anything since I've known you... We...," his voice breaks a little. "We _love_ you, Haruhi; we don't want you or Ranka to go without what you need, and we don't want to lose you. Let me say it again though: We. _Love_. You. Much more deeply and soundly than I think you realize."

Tears blur her vision. "I love all of you too... I don't know if I can ever return to school though, Kyoya. I was raped by another student of the Academy. I don't want to give up my education because of _his_ actions, but he could make an accusation against me, and I just..."

"That's why you mentioned the police taking you seriously earlier. You're worried their pockets are lined with this rapist's family money while - "

"- While I'm just a poor commoner that people think prostitutes herself to stay in the Host Club," she says. "I don't have the money to stand a chance against anyone at school, let alone _him_."

"People actually _said that_? About you being in the Club? Never mind that for right now. Are you going to tell me who this rapist is?"

"Technically, the police have said I'm not supposed to, and I don't want you acting out against him because it will damage my case or get it thrown out completely... So I can't tell you right now. You'll be able to figure it out soon enough. I'm sure it will be in the news when I finalize my written statement."

He pinches the bridge of his nose. "I understand," he tells her. He sits on the hospital bed and holds her hand. "Go to sleep. I'm here. He won't hurt you."

* * *

Haruhi wakes from her uneasy sleep to the sound of shuddering breaths. _Crying? Who's crying?_ When she looks around, she sees Kyoya in his uniform; glasses on the bedside table, elbows on his knees and head in his hands. And he's crying - trying to make as little noise as possible, but definitely crying.

"Kyoya, what's wrong?"

He stills, refusing to look at her. "My heart hurts for you, Haruhi. I should've been there, I should've - "

"Please don't blame yourself. This is nobody's fault except the guy who raped me; don't feel any guilt about it. I'll be okay."

"Did they report any breaks or fractures?"

"Not that I'm aware of. I feel really sore but it doesn't seem like anything is broken."

"Good morning, Haruhi. Kyoya, you should probably head to school before too much longer," Yuuichi says, gently rubbing his brother's shoulder. "Haruhi has no fractures or breaks; as many exams as we've done one would have showed up by now. Ryoji has contacted the Academy and explained that you're under Ootori care for serious injuries, but the board will keep that confidential excepting the need to inform teachers for the purpose of getting your work together."

"Thank you, Dr. Ootori - "

"Call me Yuuichi, if you'd like. My patients have an easier time adjusting to their medical needs when they're more familiar with their physicians and aren't feeling like we are all robotic figures just throwing medical terms at them all day. Kyoya... It's almost time for your first class. I don't mean to rush you, but - "

Kyoya stands, putting his glasses on and fixing his uniform. "I know. Thank you for seeing her, Yuuichi. Haruhi, what should I tell the others?"

She bites her lip, considering how to best give her friends the news. "Tell them I won't be coming in today, but I'll be up for other visitors after Club, if that's okay with Yuuichi."

"Ootori hospital visiting policies are based on who the patient prioritizes. We will get you the forms shortly. Kyoya, may I talk with you outside before you go to school?"

The younger Ootori gives Haruhi a brief hug and lays his chin on top of her head. "Be safe, Haruhi. Text me if you need anything, all right? Even during class. I'll reply when I can."

Tears slip down Haruhi's face. "Thanks, Kyoya. You're the best. Be safe."

* * *

"What did you need to talk to me about, Yuuichi?"

"I know you two have a deep bond; please be gentle with her," Yuuichi puts his hands up at Kyoya's defensive glare, "I know you'd never hurt her but Kyoya, she's traumatized. She's pretending to be all right but she's really not. Physically she'll recover; emotionally, if she keeps this up..."

"Haruhi's always been that way. She's _terrified_ to lean on others for any amount of help; even her father gets pushed away as a result. I'm going to help her open up and refer her to counseling after her discharge. I've got to get to school; thank you for your concern."

Kyoya slips into his desk quietly; despite almost being late, he's still the first one to arrive to class. _Thankfully there's always an extra set of supplies in here; I forgot to bring my bag with me considering Haruhi's situation... I wonder what I can do to -_

"Good morning, mon - what's wrong, Kyoya?" Tamaki asks. "Don't try to tell me it's nothing, your eyes are blotchy and swollen; you've been crying for a while."

He quickly writes a note on a piece of paper for his blonde friend. _Haruhi is in an Ootori hospital. Yuuichi is her treating physician and I stayed with her last night and most of this morning before coming here. I only left to change into my uniform. We should all visit her later._

Violet eyes widen. "Will she be all right? Is it life-threatening? Mon ami, talk to me - " the school bell rings, and students finally pour in, "Between classes or during lunch. Don't shut down on us, all right?"

Kyoya nods. "All right. Thank you, Tamaki."

After what feels like a month, all students head to the Academy cafeteria for lunch. Honey, Mori, and the twins meet Tamaki and Kyoya at their usual table. Kaoru and Hikaru are unusually quiet, as if they're worried about something. Mori looks around and elbows Honey, looking at him with a raised eyebrow. "Where's Haru-chan?" Honey asks, breaking the depressing silence in the group.

"She's been hospitalized," Tamaki says. "Kyoya was with her last night and knows more than I do, but thinks it's better for her to explain what's going on since it's an ongoing medical case."

"Should we bring her flowers - " Hikaru starts.

Kaoru finishes, "Or fancy tuna? What can we do to help her?"

Kyoya's phone vibrates. "She's texting me now, let me read these first and then we can plan something for her." His nickname for her on his phone belies the seriousness of what she says, but he ignores that.

 _Plainsong: Kyoya  
_ _Plainsong: Kyoya  
_ _Plainsong: KYOYA  
_ _Plainsong: I guess you're in class  
_ _Plainsong: I... Got some exam results..._ _My pap came back abnormal. That **bastard** may have... Given me something.  
_ _Plainsong: Everything else is coming back normal so far. They're going to run tests for, well, you know._ S _T things.  
_ _Plainsong: My previous records show no history of abnormal exams so Yuuichi is sure that this is directly related to being raped.  
_ _Plainsong: These results are gonna take about 2 weeks. The police are here now to get my statement, and Yuuichi is present to make sure I'm treated fairly, since I don't actually have a prosecutor yet. What if he tells the school that I'm a girl before you announce that my debt's been paid!?  
_ _Plainsong: (ps don't tell the guys about the pap results, please.)_

The inner conflict of feelings flashes on his face as he reads through the messages; Tamaki especially notices, but says nothing while Kyoya texts back as quickly as possible:

 _KO: If he ousts you, we can resolve it peacefully, especially since mine and Tamaki's fathers, along with the board, are already aware of your unique situation._ _No matter the results of that abnormal pap smear, I'll stand by you. We all will. We love you, Haruhi. I'm having lunch with the others and they want to do something for you. Are you going to be up for visitors later?_

 _Plainsong: Yes, **please**. It's boring in here._

"She's getting some exams done, and there are other things but I'll leave that to her to tell you. We should go to that commoner's depot and get her something from each of us, she'll enjoy that and it'll make her laugh. I'm wondering if we should close the Club early today - "

"Close the club early?" A girl who sees the twins regularly questions. "Why would you do that?"

"Haruhi isn't feeling well and we're hoping to make a visit later," Tamaki says smoothly. "I hope you girls can understand the duty we have to each other as hosts, and that we can make it up to you with an extended Club day later this week...?"

"Oh, of course! I'll make sure everyone knows what's going on!"

"Thanks, Anzu!" Hikaru says. "We really appreciate it."

* * *

"All right, everyone. Now that we've each selected a commoner gift for our favorite girl, let's go!" Tamaki points to the limo outside of the main entrance dramatically.

Gifts in tow, the boys all pile to the car; Tachibana is driving them and already knows where to go. "Here we are, sir. Please give Ms. Fujioka my best wishes for recovery."

"Thanks, Tachibana!" chirps Honey.

"Yeah, thanks," says Mori, handing him a generous tip. Hikaru, Kaoru, and Tamaki follow suit with giving tips.

"We have to present our IDs to show that we're on Haruhi's visitor list," Kyoya cautions as they enter the hospital. "Also... She..." he takes a deep breath, "She's in pretty bad shape. Try not to be surprised."

"What exactly do you mean by that, Kyoya?" Tamaki asks. "What happened?"

"I'll let you ask her yourself," he replies, tapping on the door. "Haruhi? We're here."

"Come in!"

 _She sounds unusually chipper,_ Kyoya thinks. He sets their gifts on a table at the back of the room. Then he sees her face and his jaw drops. "Haruhi, you - "

"Dad did my face before going to the bar; I didn't want all of you showing up to me looking like I was. I feel _much_ better now than I did last night."

"He didn't cover your arms, though," Hikaru says, raising a brow.

"You're covered in bruises; what happened?" Kaoru finishes.

She looks Kyoya in the eyes. "You really didn't tell them?"

He shakes his head. "I felt that would be a disrespectful violation of your privacy!"

"Close the door please, Mori-senpai?" Haruhi asks.

When the door is closed, she sighs. "You all may want to sit down. I told Yuuichi that you all were coming, so he had extra chairs brought in about an hour ago..."

They all sit; Honey and Mori on the edge of the bed, Kyoya takes a chair at the head of the bed while the twins scoot two chairs together for a makeshift couch. Tamaki sits on a chair opposite to Kyoya.

"Excuse me, I just need to take Haruhi's vitals really quickly," a nurse comes into the room. "Kyoya, Yuuichi has given me permission to ask for your assistance as you're shadowing him, do you mind helping with - "

"Not at all; what can I do?"

"Blood pressure cuff readout; it should have an oxygen indicator as well."

Kyoya wraps the cuff around Haruhi's arm gently. "I'll need you to uncross your legs and take a breath to relax so we can get the most accurate reading possible. The tightening of the cuff may agitate a bruise but it has to be done."

"Okay. Just a head's up, Dad's working overtime so he won't be visiting today."

The nurse writes down her readings and quickly steps out. "Thank you for your assistance, Kyoya!"

"No trouble at all," he bows to her before closing the door. "We should be good to just visit for a few hours, now."

"So what happened, Haru-chan? Why are you so bruised?" Honey asks.

"Before I tell you, you have to promise you won't be upset with me - "

"What!?" Kyoya asks. "Haruhi, none of us would ever be... Act..."

"I know _you_ won't, Kyoya. But I need that promise anyway. I can't tell them if I don't have that. I was reckless!"

" **Haruhi!** " He lowers his voice quickly, "I apologize for my loudness. I can't believe that - "

"Just tell us what happened!" Hikaru exclaims. "I promise we won't be upset with you!" He gestures to himself and Kaoru.

"What he said," Kaoru nods. "I promise."

"I won't be upset either," Mori and Honey say simultaneously.

"I promise, Haruhi, whatever happened... We won't be upset with you. We just want you to trust us, and to help you in any way we can."

Kyoya nods, although the light hits his glasses in a way where she can't see his eyes. _He already knows what happened anyway_ , Haruhi thinks. _They_ ** _love_** _me. They really do._

Her body shakes as she tries to collect herself. Rage fills her voice; words tumble out in a mess of sorrow and shame. "I was **_raped_**. I was raped! I was walking around campus after Club when a male student grabbed me and took me into the garden maze!" She breathes again. "There... Are no cameras there. No surveillance. I tried fighting back, but I was reckless. I'm not strong enough to take on someone that much taller than me."

Five voices shake in anger. "Who was it?"

"The police told me to keep that confidential; it'll be out soon enough. I... Should've accepted a ride from one of you yesterday. You all offered! I'm sorry I was so careless."

Arms wrap around her, and she can't tell who is who. "This is **_not_** your fault, Haru-chan," Honey says fiercely.

"It was a beautiful day to go that way," Mori tells her. "The only one at fault is that **_bastard_**."

"Why would you think - "

"We would ever be upset with you over this?" The twins ask, Kaoru first and Hikaru second. Four arms gently squeeze her middle. "We would **_never_** be."

"I concur... Wait! Did you say it was a student of the Academy?" Tamaki moves so his cheek lies on Haruhi's head.

"Yes. But I can't say any more than that for legal reasons. Thanks for not being mad at me. He could also out me as a girl to the school..."

"Your debt was paid already, as I mentioned earlier," everyone gasps, "Haruhi's one thousandth customer came in the day before yesterday; I had planned a surprise announcement for this weekend."

"Don't kick me out of the Club," she says in the direction Tamaki is standing. "Make me a second manager or a bookkeeper or something. I don't want to leave the Club. Also, I'm really hungry... Want to share some pizza?"

"Sure! Takashi and I will go get it! Let's go," Honey breaks the group hug to find his cousin. "We'll be back soon."

"Wait!" Haruhi calls at the last second. "I love you guys. Thanks for everything."

"We love you too, Haru-chan!" Honey grins. As they walk out, he squeals, "She told us she loves us!"

"Yeah," Mori smiles.

"What about us?" Kaoru, Hikaru, and Tamaki ask at the same time.

"Wait til you leave, you impatient children," Haruhi jokes.

* * *

"Visiting hours are now over," a voice comes over the intercom. "Unless you have special permissions to stay overnight, we do ask that visitors leave at this time."

Hikaru hugs Haruhi first. "Get out of here soon," he says. "We're bored."

"Love and miss you too, Hikaru."

Kaoru's next. "We have clothes designed for you, for after the school knows you're a girl. They're very close to your taste, although some are super frilly."

"Thanks, Kaoru. I look forward to trying them on. I love you."

Honey and Mori hug her at the same time. "Thanks for getting the pizza, you guys, and for being here."

"No problem, Haru-chan! We were glad to be here!"

"Yeah."

"I love you both," she says. "I really do."

After they leave, it's just Tamaki and Kyoya. "Thank you both for coming to visit. I'm sorry this happened."

"Don't apologize, Haruhi! The only one who should be apologizing is that... That... _Degenerate_!" Tamaki says. "You have no reason to apologize to us!"

"Thanks, Tamaki. I love you!"

"I love you too, Haruhi. We all do. We can come back tomorrow, yeah?" The blonde pointedly ignores the way Kyoya hides his eyes and clenches his fist.

"If I'm not discharged by then, sure! See ya later!"

"Kyoya, call me when you leave, please," the two friends shake hands before the blonde leaves.

"All right. See you tomorrow, Tamaki." After he leaves, there's a heavy silence.

"Are you okay, Kyoya? You seem out of it."

He sighs. "I'm worried about you; you felt the need to let your father do your makeup - which is something I _know_ you normally loathe - to reassure them that you're okay, when you're the one who needs reassurance. Hiding your injuries isn't going to make them go away, and you're - " he cuts himself off. _Don't go there, Ootori._

"I'm what?"

"Nothing; forget I said anything. I'll see you tomorrow before I go to school," he promises, bumping foreheads with her. "I love you."

"I love you too," she kisses his cheek. "See you tomorrow."

* * *

When he arrives home, Kyoya heads to his room and flops onto his bed. _What a terrible time to be willing to express my feelings for her; how selfish. To her and to Tama -_ his thoughts are cut off by a loud rock song coming from his phone. "Hello?"

"What was up with you in the hospital?"

"What do you mean?"

"The way you clenched your fist every time she said she loved one of us, and your silence during dinner. What's going on, Kyoya?"

"Tamaki, I'm just stressed, which I would think is understandable considering the circumstances."

" _Mon ami_ , don't lie to me. I know you're worried about Haruhi; we all are. There's something deeper though, Kyoya. Please talk to me."

After some thought, Kyoya gives in. "You want me to talk to you? Fine. Fine! It _kills_ me, knowing that had I insisted Haruhi use some _damn sense_ and accept a ride home, she could have avoided the bastard who raped her! I am also incredibly selfish, because I know you're in love with her but I am too! We all are! You are my closest friend, Tamaki, and it hurts me, knowing that my feelings could be the reason I end up alone again! You opened so many doors for me - for all of us - Tamaki, and I don't want to be the reason they end up closed!"

"Oh, _Kyoya_ ," Tamaki sighs. "I've known that you're in love with her for _months_. Haruhi will choose love for herself when she is ready; I could never resent you for loving her. We all do; as you said, we're all _in love_ with her. I can't speak for the others, but if she were to choose you that would make me unbelievably happy. Honestly, I'm a lot like her father - probably too much for her tastes. It hurts like hell, but our friendships with each other are so much more important than I could _ever_ put into words. Don't distance yourself for my sake, _mon ami_. It would hurt me, and Haruhi needs all support she can get right now. Speaking of which, I can split the cost of Haruhi's bills with you."

"Thank you, Tamaki. For calling and for the offer to split the costs."

"Of course, _mon ami_. I'll have the twins take her school work to her tomorrow; is there anything else you'd like to talk about?"

"No. What about you?"

"Not really, I was just worried about you. Try to get some sleep, _mon ami_. I love you, Kyoya."

Kyoya can't help but laugh. "So much love going around today. I love you too, Tamaki. Thank you."

* * *

Ranka's doing Haruhi's makeup the next morning. "Good morning, Ranka and Haruhi," Kyoya greets them tiredly.

"Good morning, Kyoya dear - Haruhi, hold still! You can say hello in just a moment. Let me just finish your eyeliner and there... We... Go!" He puts his makeup supplies away and scoots away from the bed. "Ta-da!"

Kyoya gasps before he can help himself.

"Is it too much?" Haruhi asks. "We can redo - "

He just smiles. "It's _perfect_."

"Thank you. I never got school work yesterday; would you - ?"

"Tamaki is already taking care of it. How are the exams and things coming?"

"The rape kit is positive, so my case is solid in court; the pap will take another week or so; it's too early to tell if I'm pregnant. Oh, I'm getting discharged today!"

He wonders what she'll do if she happens to be pregnant, but decides to not actually ask the question. "Whatever course you take in all of this, I'm here for you."

"Thank you, Kyoya. I'm going to be selecting my prosecutor today too; do you have any recommendations?"

"Fuyumi may know someone. I will check with her later today."

"Thanks! Also are you the one who got me this raccoon plush?" She asks, pulling the thing out of a paper bag. "It's precious!"

"How'd you know it was me?"

Haruhi blushes and turns shy. "You're the only one who wears this particular cologne. I'd... Know it anywhere, haha."

"Do you like it?"

"I love it. And I love you! Yes, I'm saying it a lot, to all of you. I could've _died_ , Kyoya. He was too tired - or too lazy, considering he even forgot his glasses after - to actually slit my throat like he threatened... He could have killed me. It's given me a perspective I didn't have before: I need to tell everyone I love that I love them as much as possible. I hope it doesn't become annoying."

Kyoya immediately pulls her into a crushing hug. "Your love could never be annoying, Haruhi. I didn't know he threatened you that way; I'm sorry. I should have asked, I should have - "

Her arms squeeze him tightly. "Don't blame yourself, and don't feel bad for not asking. It's gruesome and I'm still processing. Nobody is at fault except the guy in question," she starts crying, "You didn't do anything wrong! I didn't either! Why did he do this to _me_? Why can't I stop crying?"

Kyoya moves so that she's in his lap and her head is on his chest. "You've been through a traumatizing experience, Haruhi. Crying, anger, questioning, all of that is normal. It's _okay._ Please don't push me away! Cry on me. Yell about it. I don't care! Let me lo - help you!"

She buries herself deeper into him and bawls. He uses a free hand to text Tamaki.

 _KO: I won't be coming in to school; please have my work brought to the hospital.  
KO: Tamaki. I think I know who raped Haruhi. _


	14. Photostat

**A/N:** This is to lighten the mood a bit; kind of a companion of Chapter 8, _Snapshots_. I don't own any of the songs mentioned.

* * *

 **i. Goodnight & Go - Imogen Heap**

Haruhi and the twins have just graduated from Ouran Academy. Tamaki, Kyoya, Mori, Honey, and everyone's families are celebrating at the Ootori estate.

"Thanks for letting us celebrate here, Yoshio," Ranka bows. "We appreciate it," he nods at Haruhi, who's currently talking with Kyoya.

Her peals of laughter echo over the music and jovial chatter. "You can't be serious about that kind of trip!" She tells him with a snort. "You're joking."

Kyoya's a little annoyed. "If you weren't so cute, I'd - "

" _What_?"

"I think you're cute," he says simply. "Since you and Tamaki didn't work out, I don't have any qualms about saying it. Anyway, if you weren't so cute, I'd actually be a little... Put out that you're laughing at my suggestion."

"Let me celebrate my graduation with the rest of the crowd and we'll talk later. Have a wonderful night, Kyoya," Haruhi gives a small salute and walks off.

A few minutes later she sends a text:

 _I think you're cute too; thanks for not making me say it first._

* * *

 **ii. C'est La Mort - The Civil Wars**

Kyoya never thought heartbreak would hurt so badly. If it was just mourning the loss of unrequited love, it would be manageable... But she loved him. She'd just told him so just yesterday. They were planning to announce their engagement to their closest friends over a sushi dinner, but then a drunk driver had hit her while she was walking home from the supermarket. Yuuichi had said that she would most likely die, and that it would be wise to plan her funeral.

 _She's not dead, Ootori_ , he thinks to himself. _She's in a coma. And she's breathing on her own. Don't count her out._

His phone rings loudly with Haruhi's ringtone.

"Hello?"

"Hey," she says weakly. "I woke up."

He drops to his knees in his mansion's foyer and cries. "Haruhi. I thought you were going to go without me."

"We're a team," she tells him. "Just come see me, please."

"I'm on my way."

* * *

 **iii. Something Just Like This - The Chainsmokers & Coldplay **

When he looks at Tamaki, he sees the perfect prince for her. He sees total bliss, a life where money is no longer a struggler for her, and where his family doesn't try to kill his spirit anymore. _He's a great guy, Haruhi, and he loves you._ That's what he'd told her when she'd asked what he thought about his two closest friends being together. _Even if he is an idiot sometimes._ His heart can handle the rejection if they're both happy. They are worth more to him than anything else.

She calls him a few days later, right after he's finished his standard shift for the zaibatsu. "I don't want a 'great guy', Kyoya," she cuts to the chase. "I love him but I can't see a future with him. Do you know who I _can_ see a future with?"

"I... Don't know," Kyoya says. "I thought you and Tamaki were guaranteed to be endgame."

She chortles. "So did he, apparently. He's very upset with me."

"So who did you give him up for?" Kyoya asks. "Arai?"

"How mad would your father be if I picked you up right now and took you to a commoner's hotel to discuss our future together?"

"ME?" he sputters. "Haruhi, you can't be serious!"

"I've been in love with you for ages, Kyoya. If you don't feel the same, just say so, I'll - "

"I do feel the same way!" He answers hotly. "But by choosing me, I'm... I..."

"Tamaki suspected it was you as soon as I said there was someone else in that part of my heart. He says that we have his blessing but he wants to talk to you about all that personally."

Kyoya's stunned.

"How much do you want to be with me, Kyoya?" Haruhi asks. "What are you willing to give up?"

"I would give - "

"Think about it before you answer. I'll be there in about an hour to have dinner with you."

"All right. I... Love you."

"Love you too, Kyoya."

* * *

 **iv. Long Skirt/Long Jacket - Cake**

Haruhi's firm happens to neighbor the hospital where Kyoya works, so the two of them often have lunch together. One day she walks into his office in a very tailored business suit; cap-sleeved top, knee-length skirt, and a jacket that hits her calves. It's an amazing collaboration of design and her own poise that shocks Kyoya to his core.

"What is it?" she asks. "Do I have something on my face?"

"No, sorry; you just look _stunning_ today. Not that you don't look good every day, but - " Kyoya blushes, feeling childish.

Haruhi's face gains a pink tinge as well. "The twins designed this outfit and have been begging me to wear it for ages; I didn't think it would work for my profession but it's actually been a good esteem booster. Very well tailored and it works with my short hair. Here, I brought two bento boxes in case you weren't able to grab anything to eat," she places a black container in front of him. "Rice and chicken with veggies today."

"Thank you, Haruhi. You're a life-saver."

As they chat about their days and weekly plans, she notices him assessing her more closely than he normally would. "Kyoya. Are you checking me out?"

"Yes I am; with that hairstyle and that level of tailoring, you're glowing with self-confidence. I'd have to be a fool to not see how attractive you are," he shrugs. "We're both adults - particularly, we're both _single_ adults. I apologize if I've made you uncomfortable in any way."

"No, I'm just surprised that you're being so blunt. Although I really shouldn't be."

Kyoya just laughs, and their conversation drifts to other thinks for a time.

As she's leaving his office, Haruhi raises an eyebrow. "Would you be interested in a date?"

"I'll pick you up tonight at seven-thirty if that's convenient for you. Would you like me to pick an activity?"

"That works. See you later, Kyoya," she says, walking out of her office.

Kyoya watches her leave and texts Kaoru. _That short skirt-long jacket outfit you gave Haruhi is amazing. How much will it cost me to request more to be made for her?_

* * *

 **v. Feel Again - OneRepublic**

 _Emotive Nonfiction  
For the most part, he's learned to push any emotion he feels aside to better focus on his work. The only exception for years was his sister; some nights she would sneak him into her room just to let him cry, although their father would have prohibited it. Then a certain man came into his life, tearing down more of the walls he worked so hard to build. Although his sister and friend taught him the power of feeling, they have nothing on her. Despite her own naivety, she's walked into his very soul and filled it with hope and a quiet self-assurance. She's also his equal in every way that matters; the socioeconomic gap between them is totally inconsequential when matched to her intelligence, her work ethic, and her inherent goodness. She doesn't just see him; she sees into him in ways that others fail to. She doesn't even have to try! Her perception is just that full of love and awareness for those around him. He doesn't think he deserves to have her in his life, but he's so damn thankful that she chooses to be there! —_

The words are cut off by a rip in the paper; it's been ripped out of a notebook and thrown to the ground just behind the trash can. Haruhi knows Kyoya's handwriting, and her heart threatens to beat out of her throat as she reads his words. "He probably thought it went in... Why did he throw this out?" she asks no one in particular. Nobody else has arrived for Club yet so she's alone. "Where's the rest of it?" She looks for another scrap of paper in Music Room #3 but fails to find one. "Damn. I'll have to ask him later," she pockets it for reference. "Time to get the costumes out and get dressed."

*** ** *** ** *** ** *** **

Throughout Host Club hours, Haruhi seems distracted. She talks to the girls and serves their tea and snacks, but something is definitely off. Even her guests notice it.

"Haruhi, are you all right?" Ayame asks. "You are conversing and mingling with us, as per usual, but you seem extremely preoccupied with a matter of some importance. Is there anything we can do to alleviate your worries?"

Haruhi flushes. "I'm so sorry to cause you worry, Ayame. There is something on my mind but it's nothing major - "

"Are you in need of more tutoring? I am glad to assist you if need be."

"No, it's not that, but thank you. It's a personal matter," she shrugs. "It'll be resolved later today, though. More tea?"

"Haruhi!" Tamaki yells, nearly strangling her. "What kind of personal matter is on your mind? What can your Daddy do for you?!"

"Get off me so I can breathe. Otherwise I'm fine."

"Seriously, let me know if I can help in any way," Tamaki says softly. "All right?"

"Thanks, Tamaki," she smiles at him. "I appreciate it."

Kaoru and Hikaru approach Haruhi and tease her since their guests have left to attend class. Throughout all of this, Kyoya watches her with concern, making in his little black notebook. _She usually hides her worries better than this; I hope she's truly all right. Although I'm glad she's being more open. I'll have to talk to her after Club is over._

Eventually the guests trickle out, and the guys gang up on Haruhi. "All right, chick," Kaoru says. "What's actually wrong? Is it serious?"

"We just worry about you, Haru-chan," Honey says. "We care about you!"

"Don't worry, guys. I'm fine. I just need to talk to Kyoya _privately_ about my debt. All right?"

The twins and Tamaki all look at each other with surprise. "All righty then..."

Honey and Mori just give Kyoya knowing looks before heading to kendo practice.

*** ** *** ** *** **

"It's not just your debt you wanted to discuss, is it?" Kyoya questions once the door closes on Tamaki. "Let's move away from the door so they can't eavesdrop," he decides, taking her hand and leading her to a couch near her dressing room. "All right, this should be good. What do you need to discuss?"

Crinkling paper has never sounded so intimidating before. _Oh no._ "Haruhi, how did you - "

"Look at it before you say anything," she tells him. "I'm sure you know what it is but I want to make sure we have a mutual understanding about this."

He unfolds the paper and his heart sinks. "I thought I threw this away last night; how did you find it?"

"It didn't go in the trash can and I got curious, so I read it. Do you mean all of that?"

Kyoya bows his head. "Yes."

Haruhi brushes hair away from his eyes. "Look at me, Kyoya."

For a long time, they sit like that; her hand running through his hair, his hand on her knee, staring into each other's eyes. Eventually she moves her hand to the back of his head and kisses his lips tenderly. Haruhi's about to pull back, thinking she misinterpreted what he wrote, when Kyoya applies equal gentleness to her lips. Neither of them feels the need to deepen the kiss right now, so they breathe in sync, and find each other's free hands to hold.

Kyoya withdraws first, almost breathless. "How long have you felt this way about me?"

"Months, but I wasn't sure how to approach you until today. I didn't actually plan on kissing you, that just kind of... Happened," she answers sheepishly. "And you?"

"Shortly before Karuizawa... When I invited you to vacation with me."

"That was almost a year and a half ago!"

"I thought you were pursuing Tamaki," he shrugs. "That's why I helped him, and why I didn't enter the contest myself."

She smiles and presses her forehead to his. "At least we know now. The guys are gonna _flip_ though... I hope it doesn't ruin your friendships with them."

"If you hadn't approached me I would have never breathed a word of my feelings to anyone, for exactly that reason. I love Tamaki and the others too much to hurt them intentionally, but I just... You just..."

She laughs. "I kissed you first. I'll handle the guys, okay?"


End file.
